Where I find myself today is in the midst of unending dilemma: everything that seems like the norm is described as the most disdainful thing, according to what I stand for, what I believe in– my faith. I don’t fit in, and I’m the laughing stock; everyone has a field day when they get the chance to make mockery of me. In this place where I find myself, I’m surrounded by the direct inverse of who I am and what I stand for.
I remain surrounded by the reward of a promotion in exchange for amorous pleasures and the inflation of figures to implicate false profits. “In life, nothing comes on a silver platter, my dear,” one of my many bosses said to me, “just one evening in the Lori Hotel, and this promotion is yours.” His words had surprised me.
“Yes, sir. Not everything comes on a silver platter, but I worked hard for this promotion and I know it. I cannot disregard my principles and values, and insult my efforts, because of mere ambition and pleasure, sir. I’m sorry.” The words had flown out of my mouth, as my heart raced and I walked out immediately.
That was just one incident out of a million more, and each time it happened, I was either demoted or fired.
“Girl, it’s only a few figures,” my colleagues in the project department would say to me.
“It doesn’t make it less wrong than stealing, guys. We are better than this!” I would resist the pressure to encourage dishonesty, but they always refused, and I would come up with an independent project which will never see the light of day. Then, I would receive the satiric moment of my life– I’d become the subject of mockery.
Then, one early morning, being swamped in the heavy enclave of worry and discouragement, I went for a morning run; angry at how I can’t just be like everyone else, and follow what they have described as their norm. Realizing my raging run was getting the best of my breath, I paused to catch my breath, so I stopped in front of the ocean; big and beautiful. I stared at it in awe– pleased at the sight before me. Suddenly, there was a bright reflection, caused as a result of the rising of the sun. That was when I was extremely convicted of being different.
Being different in the midst of the crowd doesn’t make me any less of who I am. The values I uphold define me, and I don’t need to be bothered about it in any way. Being honest and loyal to my values and my faith may not win me a trophy here, in the midst of the dishonest crowd, but it surely does make a difference. The sun’s hue may not be like that of the ocean nor the sky, but when its time comes, it makes a difference– it brings forth the reflection of hope of a new day.
Staring at the sun, and remaining disappointed at wanting to ever compromise who I truly am, a voice echoed in my right ear, “I see you, my daughter. I see how you glorify My Name without compromise. Many lives are being transformed, and soon, just like the sun, you will rise, as you illuminate.”
I am Gloria Benita Zenithson, the lady who chooses to stand tall, and not get intermingled with the crowd, because my faith matters and my values matter. Daniel decided not to be a part of the crowd and it led him to a den of lions; prison was the immediate reward of Joseph, because he chose to flee from sexual pleasure, and the Spirit-filled Stephen experienced the merciless rain of stones upon him, because he chose to stand for the Lord. However, the time came when they shone forth brighter than the sun.
Stay different till you make a difference!
